G.I.Joe Review

G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra
Directed by: Stephen Sommers(The Mummy 1&2)

G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra was suppose to be a thrill ride of excitement filled of action and set the stage for a few sequels to pop out after. But all we received was tons of CGJ action, stiff acting performances and as generic as generic can be in an action script just with G.I. Joe Character names. Well at least we received the years funniest comedy.

G.I. Joe opens in France 1694 which made me confused and wondering "Am I screening the right Film?" We see a Scottish man being held accountable for a crime of double dealing in selling arms, and the French with horrible accents are making him pay for his trickery, by wielding a metal mask on his face that he must wear for the rest of his life. Then the movie flashes forward with the words "IN THE NOT SO DISTANT FUTURE" making me think "Wait not so distant future from France 1694 or our current time so lost, oh wait cool buildings and taxi's must be NOT SO DISTANT FUTURE for our time." Already this opening scene of "here is some cool back story" has failed miserably and just makes you feel confused.
In this NOT SO DISTANT FUTURE, leading arms maker James McCullen (cough cough) played by Christopher Eccleston has made a new weapon "nanotechnology" which when deployed could take down a whole city by eating metal and as far as I could tell anything it touches. He sells these war heads to NATO, "why they want them I have no clue?" But this is where we meet Duke (Channing Tatum) and Ripchord (Marlon Waynes).
As these two combat ready soldiers take the war heads to NATO they are attacked by the Baroness (Sienna Miller) and a fight scene takes place with hummers blowing up and the Baroness side taking names over Duke and Ripchord due to their advanced weaponry (cough cough). Finally this other unnamed group shows up to save Duke and Ripchord leading us to find out there is a secert team made up of the best of the best soldiers from all countries G.I. Joes.
When then finally get to meet Hawk (Dennis Quaid) which I was hoping would start some spark in the mediocre acting at best, but well it just made it worse. With Quaid adding a stiff, stiff performance making the scenes almost comically, especially the scene where Quaid forcefully threw in the motto of "Knowing is half the battle".
The Rise of the Cobra continues to drag on for 2 hours and 10 miens, the whole time you find yourself laughing at the ridged dialog, shotty special effects, and OVER THE TOP GENERIC PLOT TWIST;which all can be solved with in the first 20 minutes.
The acting throughout The Rise of the Cobra is pitiful and you find yourself laughing at the most serious of scenes. Channing Tatum who plays Duke, at times sounds like he is reading off cue cards most the movie adding forced emotion an weird timing on his delivery of lines. Everytime Christopher Eccleston (James McCullen/Destro) speaks you find yourself laughing at the over the top accent he places on the character. Ultimately the best acting is done by Snake Eyes (Ray Park) who doesn't even have one line through the movie because of his vow of silence which is some what horribly told in his "back story".
The Rise of the Cobra "ATTEMPTS" at making its characters have heart felt emotional back stories leading to who they are today, but these flash backs that flaunt themselves throughout the movie make you laugh at how poorly and generically written these back stories are. Even the two main ones Duke and Snake eyes make you laugh, Duke and his stiff acting makes it a comedy scene because I'm thinking Channing Tatum is the Tin Man he has no heart, and throughout Snake Eyes back story your thinking "OMG THAT'S THE KID FROM TROPIC THUNDER"making you replace the horrible lines he is saying with the great ones from Tropic Thunder.
On the plus side G.I. Joe had plenty of action, some nice violence, things that go BOOM, beautiful ladies in leather, and advanced weapons OH and cameo by Brendan Fraser.
But when the 1980's cartoon show has better voice acting then these actors portrayed in this live action rendition someone or some department made a big opps I just hope if they continue on with the next two sequels they bring in new life to the project, that might know something about good fantasy action films. Because Knowing is Half the Battle.

The Hurt Locker Review

The Hurt Locker
Directed by Kathryn Bigelow

The Hurt Locker from the start pulls every emotion you could ever want tugged on throughout an evening at a movie; laughter, fear, tension, sadness, and anxiety. The Hurt locker places you in the minds of a U.S. Army Explosive Ordinance Disposal Unit(EOD) and tosses you unto the streets of Iraq where danger could be under any innocent looking mans shirt walking past you. Jeremy Renner(28 weeks later) plays the newly appointed replacement EOD leader of Delta group located in Iraq where just a few days ago. Co-star Anthony Mackie(8 mile, Notorious) who plays another member of Delta lost their beloved original group leader.
The Hurt Locker goes on, to portray Jeremy Renner to be a loose cannon and a crazed adrenaline junkie; through many heart stopping and jaw dropping scenes. If one pays close attention they will be able to tell just how well this movie was shot. How every intense scene is pulled off, due to the amazing effort and thought used by Kathryn Bigelow. The Hurt Locker with all its heart pounding action will have you laughing at how insane the job of an EOD really is and it will have audiences squirm with excitement at the many hair raising jaw dropping experiences Delta group face.
But underlying these thrilling moments of intensity lays a true story of a real job, a real war, and real emotions. Like every good war movie the writer, actors, and director try to show the emotions of the soldiers and what they had to go through in the time of war. Where other war movies fail to show this The Hurt Locker picks up the physiological card and runs it to and through the finish line. The audience falls witness to three men who are thrown into the craziest part of a war the most deadliest job and shown how these three men deal with being in a war. The Hurt Locker shows the true physiological effects of war, it shows how these soldiers break down and how each individual handles his emotional break downs different. The Hurt Locker captures how the human mind and body weren't built as war machines and almighty killing machines, this film shows how humans break; even the toughest of our kind can't handle everything.
Built off amazing acting a well written script and a caring touch of the camera The Hurt Locker is the best dramatization of the Iraq War known to date. If you are seeking thrills, some laughs, and a movie that will have you gain new respect for our soldiers placed in this war The Hurt Locker is for you.
This is the type of movie that sneaks up on you with how good it is, and you don't realize just how amazing it is until the final scene rolls off the screen.

Moderation

Something at work really bothered me, as I worked the concession stand a lady came up and bought a Unlimited pop and popcorn refill combo;which is good she is saving money and it is a lot of food. After she completed her payment she says I'm hungry I didn't eat lunch, OK great! But the lady came back 7 times later each time she repeated the statement I didn't have lunch I'm starving! I don't believe this was a matter of she was hungry I just believe she doesn't know what the word moderation means; like most people, even i don't follow that word sometimes. But you can't just justify the fact that you had 8 buckets of popcorn by saying you didn't have lunch that worked the first two times!